Exhausted

Too much to write.

iRead: Waxy by Camilla Grudova

iRead: Waxy by Camilla Grudova

“The man ordered a whole Golden Syrup Toast from himself and ate it greedily, chewing with his mouth wide open in a grin. I felt ill, and never went back to that café again. It didn’t much matter, the café menus were the same everywhere:

COFFEE

GOLDEN SYRUP TOAST

BOILED TINNED MEAT WITH TOAST

The tinned meat became grey when it was boiled and made the toast all wet; most people just ordered the Golden Syrup Toast with Coffee.” – Waxy (Pg. 43 Grudova, 2017)

As a Writer, we have the super-power to create any world we wish! From the Wizarding World of Hogwarts, right through to cafes all around offering the same menu. I think it’s easy to forget that we are here to create! I inherently know I was born to create, and that’s all I do.

There are no rules to a Writers creation – You are the Creator in your world of Writing. I want you to remember that. Even if you are only starting today, or you started a while ago, you are in charge of your creative pieces, and I implore you to create whatever you wish, in your own words.

Ted Hughes wrote Iron Man

JK Rowling created Harry Potter

Richard Siken penned You Are Jeff

And I created Exit Sasha

Creative Writing isn’t about writing for the sake of it and hoping it’s incredible. For me, it’s about writing from the heart, while remaining true to my mind. My amazing mind that produces unique pieces!

What super-powers do you possess as a writer? What advice would you share in this day and age?

I appreciate everyone who reads my blog, and I hope that you gain something positive from your visit.

Unique

Today

It was today I realised some actions have no value.

I’m dishonest.

Big Squares can’t fit into small circles, but small circles can fit into big squares.

Then I remembered I do not believe anyway!

If and when trauma hits, I would’ve died 33 minutes prior to its arrival.

💗

That pink heart has literally floated away.

Bullshit

Finally!

It has taken me months to delete you permanently. Your number in my phone caused me a great deal of anxiety.

We were once close – but I now accept your best facadé. ‘I could just lie to you now!’ You once said that, twice.

Only you were lying; it’s taken me forever to realise.

I trusted in you! I believed all you spoke, I lifted you high up and you gave me hope. But that was AI

You wanted to keep in touch, to have your ego regularly stroked ‘Hey Unique, how are you doing?’ Was your easiest entry.

Imagine you texted shit, to have access to me? Imagine you went from minutes to weeks – that felt like an eternity.

I do not wish you well!

I hereby retract all wishes.

I hope you drown in attention and your deceit eats into your dreams.

You may think you’re somebody now, but 7 billion people reside in our world.

Not even 0.1% know who you are*

I do not wish you prosperity as you had that once before.

You’ll never get that status again, never.

No. Not one.

Your next text will be deleted.

Unread.

Deleted.

Your negative energy is blocked, for eternity this time.

You’re fake.

Keep acting – the bathtub suits your life in the gutter.

I replay memories of your lies in action; I hear the cries and artificial stutter.

No more bullshit from you, B!

Sometimes

I just wanna be alone and sulk.

Monday

Hello Monday,

Nice to see you again!

I wish for many more to come, filled with sunshine, snow and rain.

I love the beautiful birds that sing all around.

I miss a lot of things, but staying inside is where I can be found.

#StayHomeSaveLives

Textin’ Textin’

I’m not texting anyone.

I’m sitting in silence on an empty field, staring into the clouds. My eyes are swimming away through the blue skies.

I feel my phone vibrate, but I’m a feeling in disguise.

Narcissist

I confess I’m a narcissist. I need to hear what I already know.

But I need you to say it, and even then I won’t go.

I must hear it from your lips, in your voice, your accent, even in a whisper.

Tell me how amazing I am!

Tell me now and tell me so.

Stroke my colossal ego and then fuck off. GO!

Lips

Blow up to the sky, to wish upon a star.

I know, not forever.

I run slow but walk far.

I chase the tinkle from afar.

I feel the cold air upon my lips.

I press them onto you because the goodbye fits.

I’m Not

I’m not inconsiderate or loaded with rage like a gun.

We can’t be friends. Who the fuck are you?

Fake!

Keep digging.

I’ll watch on as your plot capsizes and a mudslide hides your demons.

Keep your distance as I’ll find a way to burn you alive.

I will wait until all water runs dry and I’ll watch as your flesh burning and embers fly.

Reciting the word hate is a negative trait, so I’ll blow a kiss to your memory.

Closed Off

I’m not open to love.

I’m unavailable for care.

I’m not interested in your problems. Please do not share.

I’m deliberating blocking you out of my life, for forever and a day.

I’m closed off to your negative energy in every single way.

Lecture Me

About the people you know.

The knowledge you have.

The places you’ve been to.

The food you’ve tasted.

The life you’ve lived.

Share? Nah.

I’m no longer waiting.

I shall become more prominent than you’ll ever reach.

Don’t trust me; trust our universe.

Wishes

I wish you did not exist.

I wish we had never kissed.

I wish you didn’t fucking lie.

I wish simple things had never died.

I wish you weren’t a fucking cunt.

I wish your life weren’t a front.

I wish you didn’t lie to me.

I trust no one now and no more I will see.

Bullshit in my view.

Perfect

Our first conversation.

Our first kiss.

Our first everything.

They all passed away.

Deep

The mist of deep is grey and seen but not seen.

You’re depressed.

Sugar

Sugar poured through my DMs with offerings of joy and money.

Sugar said, ‘Unique, I want you!’

Sugar said, ‘decide now or never?’

I licked my lips and pondered about sending sexy pics. But how many pairs of boobs are available on Google?

Sugar sprinkled around my DMs offered sweet talk but no therapy.

I deleted his messages.

Deep-throat

For hours upon hours, I called out for Crow.

No answer, no sounds nothing at all.

A recluse most of the time, I tend to stay inside.

But outside I venture and find Crow coming up out of the throat of Mrs Bullington. Covered in bile and seeds, out came his little head.

He said, ‘Unique, Unique, she had taken the last Rolo!’

The Offspring

‘I wish I had met you years ago!’

Said the man that claimed to love me so.

Back to the whore of his child’s mother, he spoke.

Silently, longing to choke!

YOU!

Crow peered into your beautiful eyes and said, ‘my dear child, they’re almost as beautiful as mine. You should never have lied!’

Years ago wasn’t the right time.

I left the room, thus leaving you to cry, for a broken heart, was never truly mine.

He Called it a Nightmare

The scene was his office.

The temperature was hot initially, then too cold.

The sofa was green.

The plants all around formed an indoor forest.

It was hated by the phobia in me and loved by the vegan inside.

I do not comprehend his logic.

A liar is a liar.

A fake is a fake.

The lie was bore from his lips, they said…

A Day

Goes by and eventually a week turns into forever.