I don't write. I create.
You split your heart in half and made love to me.
I accepted my half and consoled you.
You gave me time and memories I’ll cherish forever.
I told myself that…
Sometimes, some things are best left unsaid.
I wipe away the 76th tear of the day.
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I’ve missed many moments because I had to attend work. I believed my priorities were to earn first and visit later.
Only I was too tired.
I hear your voice regularly. Your advice is embedded in my heart.
Wishing won’t change anything.
I’ll forever love you.
Welcome November
Welcome, November,
The eleventh month in the year marks the eighth week count down to the end of 2021.
Last month, I spent a lot of time reflecting and working on close relationships. Friends are essential in life, and I guess I’ve been guarded in the past – many factors surrounding why I react how I react. Though October has taught me to embrace my friends more and understand why things are the way they are.
I’ve enjoyed listening to several audiobooks on Audible, specifically The Jane Austin Classics, Her Body and Other Parties by Machado and I’ve recently started The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. Audiobooks help me to get deep into a story while going for a stroll and staying healthy.
I tend to be quite hard on myself when I don’t get things completed or give myself too much to do in a short time.
In October, I have learned that when it comes to writing, I have found that I infrequently go through periods of emotions when I can’t seem to write anything – too much on my mind right now.
I’m often distracted by life, or rather the drama in the lives of others, which leads to my time being channelled into wasting energy on nonsensical conversations and people who take too much and give nothing back in return.
I need to focus on my needs and not the needs/wants of others. This will lead to an increase in productivity in my creative endeavours.
I digress.
October was a month of pleasing others and neglecting my craft. November will include more trips to the library, museums, and a lovely café that serves vegan hot chocolate.
Embrace reading every moment you can, and don’t stop.
Dame Unique
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🧠
I’m officially waking up at noon.
I’ve just had an awesome idea, which needs to marinade.
Yes, I’m a ‘well-seasoned,’ thinker.
☺️
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I understand, and I hear you; I love you. I don’t pray!
I don’t believe in random activities, though I procrastinate throughout the day.
I want you. I want me, I want us, I want life.
I need time, more time.
The bolts of life thunder around my mind, creating worlds between myself and I.
The inevitable will happen, and we will fall in love during the day. I’ll kiss you as you fall asleep and quietly walk away.
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Welcome to October 2021
I’m slightly late with this post. However, it is alright. Because my intentions are good, and why do everything the way everyone else does?
September was an interesting month; I failed to complete any reading, and I acknowledge that when my mind is busy with random thoughts, there is nothing else I can think of that will ease away the moment.
My focus was divided, and my efforts were streamlined into work. I mean, while there are other elements of my life that are important – Only, I could not stop myself from plummeting all my energy and reserves into work.
This equated my craft being neglected for another month, feelings transforming into depravity and the nonsensical notion that I’m worthless. It’s incredible how quickly a thought could turn from static to negative and beyond.
I digress.
September taught me that an online presence is short-lived, and some platforms can be annoying. All hail thee WordPress! 2020 I posted daily, 2021 I’ll post when I want, when I feel compelled to get up and write something compelling or when I need a creative release.
It’s true, you can’t change the past, but you can set the tone for your future. So this month is going to be good because I’m living as my authentic self. Selfies and hashtags are so overrated. Here’s to a blue ink pen and a notebook that is from 5 years ago.
Dame Unique
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You came to me and apologised.
I hadn’t expected it but I do appreciate it. I’m happy you did last night – it seems that you’re here to stay.
Sometimes I know I can be impulsive and I run away as fast as I can.
I’m a mini fan of ginger. Walls up, I can always do.
I sometimes imagine you’ll think one thing over the other and I convince myself that is the way.
I think maybe one day, we should spend a weekend together in New York City. Come back and adopt a rescue dog.
You said sorry and I felt it.
Thank you.
We are feeling this space and I feel sprouts, seeds and aubergines. You feel my hands.
What can say?
I’m ready.
You say one thing and do another.
You’re like, ‘ask me anything, we can talk about anything.’
I speak and you act like you’re shocked by my choice of words. Then you go silent for a while – resurfacing as nothing happened and ask, ‘are you okay?’
I mean, we are grown!
Yet, you act as though I have poisoned our conversation and crawl back to base, only to whimper a little.
Why are you so conformed to a false narrative, delivered by our society?
I look at you and think? Right! Okay!
The things you choose to do, allow me to see you under one hundred, hundred-watt lights.
Get some sealant and box yourself in.
Stay down.
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You lied right in front of two people.
You told a lie to four.
Even though you were the one who lied you started to berate me.
You cussed me out like you usually do.
You deflected and called me the liar.
I laughed until I cried.
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