Category: Life VS Reality

Liar – 20.09.2024

The way your lips move when you speak has always fascinated me.

Let’s be real; no one is interested in you.

The way your fingers twitch when you tweet, and your voice wails out.

Let’s be real; no one cares about you.

The way you lie and you lie, and you gaslight and lie and reverse over a swan you ran over earlier. Then you fall asleep. Wake up and swear to your God that you’re innocent, and you hate how witnesses are reporting your crimes. 

You cry out like a bitch to the feds about how your traits are on the line here, and you don’t think it’s fair that the news is printing eyewitness testimony.

After all, you know you’re innocent, right?

Let’s be accurate; you think what you think, and even the truth has no space in your life. So your head has you spinning, allegedly.

You make up shit and assume that the editor is spending time pouring gold on. She knows nothing about you, to write about you. However, past and present witnesses have the mic and the timeline of deceit, and most importantly, they can attest under oath that you regularly attack swans.

Crow chants out at 1800; your body bears witness to all your violent crimes. 

Your lips move and echo your lies, with tears and pain on the hour. You snarl and snigger at your brilliant ways of manipulation. You play victim so well, yet you hold the knife perfectly, not even bothered about cross-contamination; you raise, and you stab. You stab, and you twist. You twist and assign blame, stating, ‘Your response made me do this.’ 

Then you hide your weapons, you cry wolf and explain to the authorities that you were attacked! Your character was defamed, and your traits were contaminated.

Crow now perches on my left shoulder, and he plucks a prawn from my portion of King Prawn egg fried rice with the soya-ginger sauce in a small dipping bowl. 

We are silent in this space.

One of the surviving swans makes a statement that coincides with witness testimony.

You scream out, ‘I’m innocent’, as the detective finds evidence to prove you’re a liar. 

Liar.

Pockets – 19.09.2024

Every time you have the time and space to improve, you do nothing.

I hint as I speak, I highlight with red rings of fire. Yet you sit back and act like a bitch. 

Stomp your feet and throw yourself onto a bed of floral, fresh memory foam, and you peek before your soft landing.

You pluck out yet another appeasement and sprinkle it around me, hoping it remains as effective as the last dose.

You forget that all things have an expiry date, even plastic degrades, eventually.

I could draw a map daily, provide a flashlight and, of course, sustenance, and guide you myself, but you’d get lost again. I’d forever state how lucky you were to end up exactly where you started.

It’s a miracle.

Bless my soul for believing in you. 

These days, I don’t even get my hiking boots on. I sit in a cosy chair, sip hot chocolate and catch up with EastEnders. There simply isn’t time to volunteer anymore.

Direction

Right now, I feel good. Thank you.

Tomorrow, I’ll feel better.

In an hour, I’ll feel restful and at peace with last weekend’s peril and demise.

I’m thankful for being taught valuable lessons and for confirmation that my spirit is centred and my moral compass is aligned with my purpose.

Take the Stage – 17.08.2024

Tonight

My head is tired.

My thoughts are on high-speed.

Abandonment is painful.

Everyone goes, eventually.

Trust is costly, and time is a trait of age.

I’m frozen with the memory that my writing was admonished for expressing my feelings. I’m cold with the thoughts that I thought you would never behave in this way.

Even knowing my trauma, you opened the curtains and re-enacted one of the worst things anyone has ever done in my life. 

Today – 17.08.2024

He saw I was down, injured by shards of misinterpretation. No! Misrepresentation! The information was ambiguous and clearly indicated a meeting.

I bled out, and he asked, ‘What are you up to?’ 

Then left me there for 24hrs.

Thankfully, I managed to get help. Miraculously, I survived the night. Regrettably, I sent a text. Notably, it went unanswered. Lazily, one word was sent in response. Secretly, I pondered over my next move.

I’m awake now. I reckon I’ll be okay. My new scars cover old scars, hiding my love for the unknown and perhaps the inconsiderate. 

Tears are there, and a great escape is pending, but I push back. Well, step back. This is too much. 

Now he’s gone. 

Vulnerable

Two nights ago, I dreamt about the meaning of the word vulnerable.

I realised I had misunderstood the meaning of the word. I was out by pages.

I stood up and apologised in the only way I knew best – through writing.

I have spent another twenty-four hours ruminating over the word’s meaning and actions.

I mean, I’m not the most intelligent form of existence.

You feel vulnerable with me.

What is happening is a fine blend of elements that take time to create.

Wax seal over the opening.

Welcome December 2021

Hello December!

What a time it has been so far; I’ve been restless with my thoughts and lacklustre with my writing—November of a month of planning and preparing but failing to execute everything.

I’ve listened to an array of audiobooks but did not complete the chain by reading paperbacks. Often I feel guilty about that, for I have a vast collection of creative pieces written by amazing people. Yet, I pass them by each day and note the new layer of dust each week.

At the end of November, I accepted that I had not written due to a mental blockage. Instead, I’m riddled with self-doubt and overcome with stress and fear of failing. It appears I have been struggling for months, and I need to break free to thrive and flourish.

Today is the day I will restart the chain!

Goal: Write 100 words per day.

Unique

Welcome November 2021

Welcome November

Welcome, November,

The eleventh month in the year marks the eighth week count down to the end of 2021.

Last month, I spent a lot of time reflecting and working on close relationships. Friends are essential in life, and I guess I’ve been guarded in the past – many factors surrounding why I react how I react. Though October has taught me to embrace my friends more and understand why things are the way they are.

I’ve enjoyed listening to several audiobooks on Audible, specifically The Jane Austin Classics, Her Body and Other Parties by Machado and I’ve recently started The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. Audiobooks help me to get deep into a story while going for a stroll and staying healthy.

I tend to be quite hard on myself when I don’t get things completed or give myself too much to do in a short time.

In October, I have learned that when it comes to writing, I have found that I infrequently go through periods of emotions when I can’t seem to write anything – too much on my mind right now.

I’m often distracted by life, or rather the drama in the lives of others, which leads to my time being channelled into wasting energy on nonsensical conversations and people who take too much and give nothing back in return.

I need to focus on my needs and not the needs/wants of others. This will lead to an increase in productivity in my creative endeavours.

I digress.

October was a month of pleasing others and neglecting my craft. November will include more trips to the library, museums, and a lovely café that serves vegan hot chocolate.

Embrace reading every moment you can, and don’t stop.

Dame Unique