Almost daily I miss our bond.
I love you and I’m sorry we never remained friends.
I know in my heart we were bought together to educate specific areas of my life.
I know in my soul that were it not for your presence, I would never have levelled up!
You may never reach out following our last conversation. However, if you did? Know I’ll be happy to hear from you.
I may never contact you in this world. However, take comfort in the fact that I want to.
I’m in a place where my thoughts are valued and my points are understood. I’ve found a space for my creativity to thrive and for my heart to expand with joy.
I have a bounty of gratitude I reflect upon daily.
Our initial bond gave birth to a whole new universe and I’ll forever remain dedicated to the gift. Your role in this has been noted and tears have fallen.
B is for Blue
Your blue eyes are kind and peaceful.
I find peace in your sky-blue eyes.
There’s something about you that intrigues me so.
There’s everything about you, I wish to know.
I will know.
I will know.
I will know.
It keeps pulling up over the years and tries its best to drag me down.
If I smile in your presence I’m truly delighted.
The processes have me seduced by the flow. The many flows, within veins I’ve never thought to go.
Exploration of cavities can lead me to race through the darkness in my mind.
Toxins, disguised as love, always catch me by surprise.
I fear the dark side, yet my arms remain open.
I cringe at the nightmares that invade my day-dreams.
I shudder away from all signs of love, as I sense evil within loves true meaning.
It keeps comin’ thru’ like an old flame burning bridges. Like a snake in unicorn skin, only I see the ridges!
The diagram you place before me isn’t accurate, to say the least.
Deep in your eyes, I see jealously and bewilderment. I see love and comfort entangled around an iron blade. I see the lies you are eager to share, delivered alongside the thorny steams of white roses.
I kiss you then close my eyes.
I wholeheartedly trust in our universe.
DNA blend and match.
Fuelled growth with nourishment.
Blessings to the world from our universe.
Your little brown eyes are everything.
You are macho.
That I agree.
You speak all adventures.
I’ve seen nothing of value.
What is Love?
I’m looking at it.
I’ve been tormented by your silence.
Incapacitated by your love.
Lost time over how you’ve treated me.
Scars on my arms and etched into my mind.
I never asked for this. I only wanted to love and be loved.
When you don’t like an action I’ve taken, you impose an order of silence.
I wait anxiously to discover the consequence.
I lay beside you, awake.
You hold me tightly and whisper.
Inside I’m broken.
Inside I’m broken.
Inside I’m broken.
I wake up and you’ve made breakfast.
You’re happy! You kiss me.
Did you not?
Did we not?
Did I not?
Your body embraces mine on a sunlit balcony.
I want to feel bliss. But fear races through me.
Why am I afraid of you?
The morning is the day after the night before.
#LoveDrought plays 💙💙💙
To the one (I) lived with little ignition.
Mrs Pepperdew peppered you with spice.
Mrs Pepperdew peppered you how nice?
Mrs Pepperdew flummoxed you each time.
Mrs Pepperdew connected you through rhyme.
Mrs Pepperdew sang to you, with aromatic spices.
Mrs Pepperdew convinced you that you could sing. But Mrs Pepperdew mocked you, as crow swooped in, ripped your tongue out and tossed it into the fire.
It snapped, it crackled, it fizzed, and it banged.
Mrs Pepperdew sang and she sang, and she sang!
I Died First
I died 1st
I woke, I worried, I wondered, I fed.
I worried more.
I identified. I stressed.
I tapped, I thought.
I cried. I cried. I imploded, I scowled.
I was vex.
It was a mess.
You had lied.
I dispatched our connect.
She died 1st.
A Silent Text
I received a silent text message thanking me for my contribution.
It never beeped, but I bleeped!
Fuck you! Obscenities monitored and wiped out.
Gee, declarations were live – attributing delusion to the success.
I received a silent text message, it read:
What I Learned in 2019
- Friendships: I learnt that I don’t need years upon years to call someone a friend. I’ve met some fantastic people this year, and I’m happy that they’re in my life.
- Discussions: In 2020, I won’t be discussing the following aspects of my life – love, finances and challenges. I found through talking about such topics, it led to people watering down things and entwining their opinions with that they feel should be my actions.
- Advice: This links into the above a little, I won’t be taking any advice on the above. This year, I’ve asked for advice, and it’s all been nonsense. I’ve no time for it.
- Time: My time is just that, MINE! Some people have this sense of entitlement as if I owe a debt of time that can be paid back in random instalments. Time is so precious, I know that saying is cliché, but it is true. No longer will I allow my time to be stolen by time thieves, who never seem to grasp that I have no obligation to fulfil their requests.
- Creativity: This year, I have tapped into a part of my creativity that has allowed me to produce some amazing pieces. (I’m eternally thankful.) I’ve been writing more and I’m both proud and astonished at the short-stories I have created. Some have taken me months to tease out of my mind and translate onto paper.
- Reflection: I have a period of reflection every single day. I think about what goals I have completed and plan for the next day. It helps me to relax, as an introvert, I need to use a lot of mental energy, so reflective thinking is beautiful.
Although 2019 will be over in a few hours, I’m not running away from it. I accept it has been a turbulent year for me and with turbulence comes lessons learnt. I’m taking this knowledge into 2020 and building upon it.
I don’t make resolutions, as goals I set, I start them the day I set them. No point in waiting for New Year’s Eve, life is never guaranteed.
Thank you all for following me on my creative journey, I shall try to post more frequently and read more. I truly appreciate your continuous support.
Thank you 2019
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