Thoughts On: A Married Mans Story – K. Mansfield

“Tell me – do you think physical beauty is sp very important? I don’t like to think about how often she rehearsed that question. And do you know what I answered? At that moment, as if at my command, there came a gush of hard bright sound from the band. And I managed to shout above it – cheerfully – ‘I didn’t hear what you said.’ Devilish wasn’t it? Perhaps not wholly. She looked like the poor patient who hears the surgeon say, ‘It will certainly be necessary to perform the operation – but not now!’ pg. 7

This short story by Katherine Mansfield reminds me of the way many of us approach our relationships. We act! A lot of the time; surprised, shocked, sad, happy, pleasured. That list could go on and on and on.

     Rather than just be ourselves and express our natural reaction to something – many of us plot away scenarios. We dream of the outcomes, which more often than not are visuals that everything works in our favour.

     Only, in reality, we have no control over the actions of others – Yes! We can influence people, close by and those that you’ll never meet or even know of their existence. But you have no control over their reactions/actions/behaviours.

This story resonates with me quite a lot: the need to please your partner, the desires for validity without explicitly asking for reassurances. The weird intrigue, trying to understand the way your partner thinks? I chuckled to myself, as both characters reminded me of the past and my random approaches to things within a relationship.

     I’ve learnt a lot throughout life and I don’t doubt it will be useful in my future. I know deep down I’ll keep in mind the times I chose stupidity over normalcy. I’m sure my love life will grow rich with knowledge and bare fruits of gratitude, for the power of love.

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