Tag: words

Are You Awake?

When I’m alone with my thoughts wishing our world was better, I think about you.

It’s dark in our country at this moment in time and I know you’re at home, eyes open and head down.

I would pray you call, but I remember your faults. And prayer is a conversation with myself.

You beat down my soul and drowned me in your lies. Water puts out fire it’s true, but ice can also burn through flesh.

I picture your tainted bar; you know the one you pissed on with your weaknesses. I recall that leash around your neck, only allowed you to commute to your office, home and wherever the Boss commanded you.

Are you awake?

Of course, you hiss desperation into the air and blow that through to my ears. Then you cry alone under the safety of a user for an employee.

I remember the mornings you beeped into my private space…scattered messages, deeper lies and flattened truths.

Let me tell you, the lies you spawned this time last year have already manifested over what you claim to fly with. When yet another drains your existence, you’ll wish you were sleeping eternally.

In satisfactory memory of the worm that wiggled its way through my fruit bowl.

The Blame Game

At first, they blamed a group of people, because a video went viral and showed someone eating a bat.

Then they blamed a lab for allowing it to break free.

Then a small city was blamed and all the residents were labelled as people saw fit.

Later an entire country was blamed for it causing this.

They once ridiculed the health services and mocked cleaners, spat on bin men and stole from the doorsteps delivery drivers frequented.

Now they cheer them – they clap for our carers because they tell themselves that if I clap on a Thursday at 2000 GMT if I ever get COVID19 the NHS will save me.

Some blame the NHS for treating the sick, commenting, ‘You’re spreading COVID19, as you’re in contact with people who have it.’

Then they blame the government for suggesting we stay inside, stay safe and protect others, to keep everyone alive.

‘The Government have made the virus up!’  I heard a man state as I visited Tesco’s, ‘they wanna keep us quiet so that they can build more 5G towers! Fuck Trump!’

Then 5G towers were burnt to the core, apparently, they spread COVID19.

The blame was placed onto Corona beer, how unfortunate and unjust.

The blame shifted to the elderly, their immunity the lowest.

The blame was placed onto vegans and then taken away. The sales of oat milk shot up tenfold, what more could anyone say?

The blame was actioned on black people who resided in the country COVID19 was born. Videos circulated showing them being banned from the stores and locked out from their temporary homes.

The blame was sprinkled across wet markets over there and there and there. However, they continued the operate even though COVID19 had taken away many lives.

The blame sauntered to news reporters, medical staff, public transportation and lack of sanitation. #WashYourHands the main form of mass communication.

We are a world that enjoys pointing fingers, like the only kid that never stole a cookie from the jar. COVID19 is still present, yet we #Blame others and focus on who to troll next?

SOME PEOPLE SHOW NO SYMPTOMS OF HAVING CORONAVIRUS

We all lose out in the end, COVID19 does not discriminate.

The blame masturbated over social media and climaxed in the eyes of many…

The Complexities of Time

Time encouraged me to trust you.

Time pushed me to share.

Time gave me confidence.

Time accepted all I had to bare.

Complexed was your mind, intertwined with mine.

Complexed was my thought processes 90% of the time.

Complexed became your signature when what you said was opposite to your actions.

Complexities came about like bad acne, not enough treatment to gain traction.

Time taught me that you’re fraudulent.

Time set me on fire.

Time burnt away my emotions.

Time left you as a liar.

Corona

You’ve stopped drinking Corona beer through fear of catching COVID19, in other words, your ignorant mind has convinced you that COVID19 has been lingering for years upon years around the world, in bottles! That many people have been buying and consuming long before the COVID19 pandemic.

During my daily walk, I see you, I see many of you walking around like no virus exists. I see you standing right next to strangers or walking by them so closely, that you’re inches apart! Only a few inches.

COVID19 is still taking lives away from our Earth.

You’re out wandering around the streets, it’s more than essential travel! How do I know? Because I see you, I’ve seen you like zombies!

COVID19 is still present and raging through our earth.

Yet, you walk aimlessly around in close contact with everyone, not a care in the world.

They may not have used the Nightingale hospital straight away, but it does not take an expert to see that they will be busy in a matter of weeks.

Social distancing markers on the floor but only a small percentage adhere to the rules. I went out this morning to purchase essentials:

  • Sanitary Towels
  • Handwash
  • Drain Cleaner
  • Tissues
  • Hayfever Eyedrops
  • Hayfever tablets

I arrived at the shop at 9 am, opening time. While adhering to social-distancing rules, 3 people came along and casually started browsing in the same box I was standing within – I had been in the shop for about 20 seconds.

I want this to be over as much as everyone else, but not at the cost of even more people dying – additional deaths because ignorant, selfish, detrimental people think that ‘easing lockdown’ is equal to the end of COVID19.

     Coronavirus is roaming around our earth, invading people, choking them by filling their lungs with mucus and unfortunately, ending some lives. All because some of you are ignoring the rules and doing whatever you feel like – the sun is shining, let’s go outside and mingle. Let’s socialise and fuck the 2-metre social-distancing rules, I can stand/walk where the fuck I like.

‘It’s summertime bitches!’

Let’s play Russian Roulette with everyone’s lives!

Don’t worry about dying, we clap for the NHS every Thursday at 20:00.

Object: Whiteboard

You’re not screwed into a wall, as I move you from room to room, infrequently.

I write on you in various colours, mainly blue as blue is my favourite colour.

I often notice scratches left on the wall I once leaned you against, aghast on my face, as a tenant I’m disgraced – in my head that is. I wonder if my landlord will deduct £5 off my deposit for wear and tear?

Almost every time I start I write at the top of you in black ink ‘W/C 3RD MAY 2020 – TODO!’ was the last thing I titled you.

OVERDUE***

Rests below, dutifully so.

I list the number of things I must complete ASAP for my degree. Only, I never complete them on time. I like writing on you.

I enjoy spraying you and rubbing you out!

Lately, you have this unyielding power to inflict emotional pain through me, via the medium of reminding me that I’ve not completed anything on your list. Sometimes, I will move you away, so I don’t have to see you unless I happen to frequent the room you’re situated in.

I cheat. Because I will happily type up a new list and print it off, duplicate it in all three of my diaries…come back next week and do it again.

I apologise.

I promise to spray you down and clean you up, I promise I’ll do that today.

Fight Club

So I understand from the female voice that you flirted with a girl from Sainsbury’s and it must have  been some charming words used, as your girlfriend goes on to state, ‘you don’t tell me I’m beautiful.’

Right there, was a sign of her insecurities but you never provided her with any comfort. You replied, ‘you fucking stupid bitch! I’ll fucking go to my mums, you fucking whore! You’re the one sleeping with all the men you see, fucking tramp.’

I heard you slam the same door repeatedly, then you growled. I assume she remained in one spot, as her sound never seemed to move. However, yours went through your living space. She screamed, ‘I don’t care anymore.’ You responded by shouting over her, ‘the thing is yeah, you’re a fucking stupid bitch and I can do better than you. I only told the girl she looked good; everyone needs compliments during lockdown. I don’t need a dumb bitch like you in my life. Shut the fuck up!’

Her cries continue and after a few more fights with multiple inanimate objects, you slam the front door. I heard the lock turn…

A few moments pass and her crying turns into sobbing on the phone to her friend. I form the assumption that this particular friend has heard it all before, as your girlfriend shouts, ‘What would you know? You’re not understanding what I’m saying, this is a different situation, it happened today!’

It’s around 0100 I know you’ve returned as she’s moaning, no, not the crying she was doing earlier. She’s moaning in sexual delight, you’re silent! Apart from the odd pleasurable grumble…

It’s a new day, I think this is the first day you both made it past 12 hrs before fighting, again. A glass is broken, let’s assume it was glass from dinner? I hear you shouting (yet again,) ‘Who the fuck is gonna want a skanky, dirty, fucking hoe like you?’

The day after that, I hear the police arrive, only they knock the wrong door – I hope you heard them state, ‘we are here following a report of domestic violence.’

Monday Madness

Did I wake up, or was I still asleep?

Was I drinking last night, or did I just sleep?

When did our friendship die, I remember 10 months ago but it feels like recently?

Can you break through the wall that leads up to my heart and resuscitate me?

Was I horrible to you in a previous life?

Do you love my voice more than you love my soul?

Are we still aware of one another?

‘There’s really no end, there’s really no beginning.’ – Jhene Aiko

Object: The Notebook

I’ve had the pleasure of seeing you on a frosted glass shelf. A beautiful hue of blue sparking in my line of sight. I picked you up and opened you, read the blank lines down a few pages. I envision my words written in blue ink, short-stories, random quotes, poetry and whatever you think.

     The first page on the inside was a subtle marine blue, reminded me of our ocean and depths of each blue hue. I love the colour blue, so I pick you up and buy you. I take you home and sign Unique inside you.

     The date is today and today is special like yesterday, I’m alive! I’m thankful for our universe. I write a few sentences along your light blue lines.

RISK!

Living is a risk we all take every day, my notebook is my notebook and as long as I live, I’ll write away.

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